Bad Responses From Children: What Should We Do And What Not

Bad answers from children can end up becoming a real headache for parents. Here we tell you what the possible causes may be and what it does or does not do to them.

On many occasions, the bad answers of children, which are nothing more than the manifestation of their feelings of rebellion, destroy the parents’ patience. The way to answer or respond will be different depending on each age.

All children, when they stop being babies, believe and want it to revolve around their needs. It is then that they react to the authority of the parents in a provocative way and with bad answers . When we scold them, they respond in bad ways or do not pay attention to what we say; they want to impose their opinion and the problem is that they do it in a bad way.

Possible causes of children’s bad answers

There may be different causes that provoke these rebellious situations and that are not suitable for the healthy psychological and emotional development of our children.

• The arrival of a new baby brother (before the child is 3 years old) can trigger jealousy and envy that end up causing bad responses in children to anything we say to them.
• Parental separation or divorce . It provokes feelings of insecurity caused by his need for affection and protection from both parents. This, sometimes, ends up causing inappropriate responses, sometimes even aggressive, from children (remember that it is their way of defending themselves).
• A change of house, school or even city can cause the little ones to have changes in their behavior, be more irritable and irascible and have bad answers. These changes, which we parents believe will be for the better, we do not stop to think that the child may find it difficult, since he feels identified with that house, school or city in which he lived.

• Lack of clear limits, contradictions of parents with regard to the education of children or disavowal between both can also end up causing bad responses in children.

What are the bad answers of children according to age?

Depending on the age of the children, their way of responding to certain situations is different and, moreover, they express it differently.

• Children from 0 to 2 years old . Their aggressiveness is due to the fact that they are not able to control their impulses and, in the same way, they are also incapable of directing their anger correctly.
• From 2 to 3 years . These ages are marked by negativity; children tend to say no to everything that is proposed to them, even if they end up accepting it. It is at this time that your personality is forming and those bad answers are a sign of it.
• From 4 to 6 years old,  they have already integrated basic habits and rules into their daily life. They like to give orders, express their autonomy and get angry when they fail.

Some tips for children’s bad answers

Given the bad answers from children, we can follow some of these tips that we are going to see below:

1. We will explain, in a calm and direct way, that this way of behaving is not right. “I love you very much, but that is not the way to answer me . “
2. We will not get angry or answer in the same way that our son has.
3. We will reinforce your good manners ; When you answer us correctly, we will praise that good behavior.
4. We will try to find out what could be the cause of your bad reply  and we will find a solution.
5. We will not label it a “contest”; first we must ask ourselves why he answers us like this at that moment.
6. We will negotiate with him the establishment of clear rules , but without exceeding ourselves.
7. We will give you time to reflect on why you are saying these things. After a while, we will speak with him again to try to solve the problem. We will let the child himself contribute possible solutions.

What can we do if they are prolonged in time?

The above tips can help us manage children’s bad responses at the time they occur, but if they last over time, these ideas can help us :

• Parents should not answer them badly when their behavior is not appropriate , because we must not forget that we are their example and, in the end, they may end up imitating us; furthermore, we would be giving him a contradictory message: “you can’t give bad answers, but we can . “
• An effective way to end children’s bad responses, especially if they last for a long time, is to praise the opposite behavior , that is, when they behave in a correct and pleasant way, we will praise them.
• Parents are the ones who know our children best and we sure know when our child is going to answer us in an inappropriate way. In that case, it is best to try to distract him with another activity or game ; In this way, you will forget why you were upset.
  

• If our child asks us for something in a bad way, we do not have to fulfill his wish , no matter how much he yells at us, until he says it to us in an appropriate way. On many occasions, children are disoriented and we can teach them the values ​​of respect for others and for other opinions through stories.
• When the child continues to answer in bad ways and, in addition, it happens in a public place, we will wait to talk to him when we get home. In this way, we will do it more calmly, in private and establish rules of conduct.

In short, the bad answers of children are something that happens frequently; it is a way of expressing your rebellion or simply an inability to control your impulses. As we have already seen, the reason for these responses also depends on the age of the children . If we take into account the advice that we have seen, we will be able to better handle ourselves in those situations.

It is important to be patient, be their example and not have bad answers with them , because the little ones imitate us. If you want to correct those bad answers, these tips can be of great help. What are you waiting for to put them into practice?