Why The Discipline Of Good Intentions Is Necessary
Many parents wonder what they can do to make their child behave well. Discipline strategies generally address what to do in the moment and usually after a child has blown up and things have gone wrong. Therefore, the discipline of good intentions is necessary.
In this sense, there is a particular discipline strategy that does not require waiting for an incident to occur. A more proactive approach is needed to address problem behavior and takes into account the developmental and relational needs of a child.
The discipline of good intentions
We refer to the discipline of good intentions, whose objective is to work on parenting problems in terms of behavior at the time when emotions and things get complicated. Good intentions discipline means that a parent uses discipline with a child to help steer their behavior in the right direction.
It is done in anticipation of challenges and means that an adult will need to take a proactive stance to work before incidents. While it is impossible to predict all the problems that can develop with children, adults are generally aware of what their children will find most difficult.
When a parent solicits the intentions of a child, they are trying to put their child on the right side before incidents. The little one has the opportunity to agree, before the situations, that he will behave in a certain way.
How to use the discipline of good intentions?
For example, if you are going out with your children on a field trip, you can tell them, in advance, something like: “The aquarium is a big place and I need to know where you are at all times. Can I count on you to hold my hand and be by my side all the time while we are there? “
If you go to the park with your children, you can ask them something like: “Can I count on you to come with me when it’s time to leave the park and not run away and say you don’t want to leave? We’ll be in the park for as long as we can, but when we have to go, I’ll need you to come quickly. Have you all understood it?
Children may later forget it and resist a bit. But once you remind them of their promise of good intentions, they will calm their frustration and resistance, and they will be more cooperative. They will feel involved in the decision made and will participate in it.
Good intentions discipline avoids conflict
When you use the discipline of good intentions in advance, you can ease the transition between events and involve less friction in your relationship with your children (at any age). This type of discipline is a tool that can always be used, no matter how old the children are.
You can use it more frequently when you need to anticipate issues that could be conflictive, such as buying a toy for a friend at the toy store to prevent children from wanting a gift for each one as well.
You can also ask them if you can count on them to clean their bedrooms without you having to continually ask them to do so. This will save you a lot of resistance and frustration.
The benefits of discipline
There are a number of developmental benefits for a child when adults request their good intentions. This action naturally imparts parental values and guides children to what is considered civilized behavior. He also puts the little one’s hands on the wheel when it comes to his own actions; l hildren understand that they are responsible for their own actions at all times.
In addition, when the infant commits and complies, he will avoid punishments, constant requests or negative consequences for his actions.
This type of discipline tool also helps preserve the relationship between parents and children and avoids power struggles in moments charged with intense emotions in which the patience of both parties can quickly wear out. It is necessary to be aware, as parents, that you do not have to wait for a child to make a mistake to guide him in the right direction.
Another benefit is that this is about intentions and not perfection. Leave plenty of room for a child to choose the indicated path, even if it is not always what he wants, but he will know that it is the right thing to do.
It is also an effective discipline strategy that can be used in place of consequences. Which requires a child to think twice before acting and to come forward after there has been a problem.
No harsh discipline is required
We know that young children typically don’t think twice about acting until brain integration has occurred between the ages of five to seven, on average. Up to this point, they are instinctively moving and emotional outbursts are common.
When we solicit the good intentions of an infant, we rely on our relationship with them to put them on our side. This will help us avoid using overly harsh discipline techniques in order to achieve compliance. If a child is not attached to an adult, the ability to point an infant in a particular direction is weak or even non-existent.
