How To Achieve Positive Authority

How to achieve positive authority

Having a solid authority is the key so that family dynamics are based on respect and teamwork, but be careful, you run the risk of conceiving a negative and arbitrary authority if you stop taking into account the opinion of the other members Of your family.

Below we will show you some tips so that you can have a positive authority, which is something spontaneous and not simply imposed.

6 tips for achieving positive authority

1. Admit your mistakes:

The first step to gain the respect and admiration of your children is that you learn that mistakes are something that can happen and that what is really important is to have the courage and honesty to recognize that they have acted badly.

Assuming you were wrong will show your children that they should do it too.

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2. Make a plan:

An important aspect for you to be able to develop a positive authority in your family is to establish routines for all the members of your team. It is convenient that your children know what to do and when to do it; Always keep in mind that assigning homework is essential to exercise discipline.

3. One thing at a time:

It’s great that you want your family to have healthy habits, but you can’t expect all changes to happen suddenly. If you want to be successful, you must introduce each task gradually and only after seeing that the previous measure worked properly.

4. Take care of the way you talk to them:

It is not logical for someone who yells all the time to demand that their children speak to them with respect and in a moderate tone. Always take care of the way you talk to your children, no matter their age, so they will see with your example that things can be said without getting upset and without losing respect for the other.

5. Help them be independent:

Especially in adolescence, your children will ask you to let them make decisions. N or should limit them , to the contrary, if they accompany and give you options to choose but you already have thought carefully feel you take into consideration your opinion and be more committed to doing.

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6. Be consistent:

To strengthen a positive authority, it is necessary that both parents agree to the rules they set and that both act when corrections are necessary. They should not be overruled at any time.

It is also important that the rules are respected at all times, without exceptions and that if there is any change, it is well thought out and not arbitrary.

The 5 most common mistakes:

1. Be permissive:

When we are trying to build the character of our children, we must not allow for ambiguity. Be clear about what is correct or not.

2. Not knowing how to say “no”:

When you deny your child something, you have clear reasons for doing so. If you say no, you have to stay firm in your position and not give in a few minutes later; If you do, your children may start to manipulate you.

3. Be authoritative:

Just as it is not okay to be permissive, it is not okay to be too invasive or overbearing. Authority is earned by good example, it should not be imposed.

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4. Talk for the sake of talking:

If you make a promise (be it positive or negative), it must always be kept. Words should not be thrown that you are not willing to fulfill.

5. Don’t listen:

Another very common mistake is to punish or condemn a behavior without having listened to the reasons that our children may give us. Dialogue and understanding should come first in family relationships.

Tips for developing positive authority:

  • Listen to your children.
  • Reason with them.
  • Encourage them to be independent.
  • Establish equitable routines and activities that strengthen discipline.
  • Show your affection openly.
  • Sets limits, consequences, and expectations derived from the family’s behavior.
  • Understand the family as a team in which all members are equally valuable.
  • Even if you are flexible, always keep clear that parents are the authority of the family.
  • Be a role model for the behaviors you ask of your children.
  • Help your children to become individuals with clear goals and life purposes.
  • Keep the balance between affection and authority.
  • Be consistent with the rules you set.

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